Taking an Honest Look at the Numbers to Get Where You Want to Be

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“Interpretation keeps the thing that feels impossible actually impossible and out of reach.”

In this episode, I’m talking about taking a good, hard look at the things we’re afraid to look at—the metrics and feedback that tell us where we are in relation to our goals. That might be our financial state, our weight and lab work, what our partner feels about us and our relationship, or how our employer or clients rate our work. Whatever it is, we often avoid facing these things due to a fear of negative feedback or lower-than-optimal results because of what we interpret that to mean about us, other people, or the world. Really, it’s all just insight and information that can help us move toward what we want far more rapidly!

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Read my book, What Really Happened?, to break free from interpretations.

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What to listen for:

  • My story of facing my finances in my 20’s
  • The calm that comes with knowing where you stand
  • Anxiety of the unknown can paralyze and hold us back
  • Triggers are a gift because they’re ready to be healed
  • How avoidance keeps us stalled out

“It will stir up emotions to look at the numbers, to look at the metrics, to get clear on where you actually stand with things. But as with everything, it’s a gift because anywhere we’re interpreting, that’s holding us back from creating what we want. If I’m too scared to look at my numbers because that will mean that I am a gross and disgusting person who is unlovable at their core and can never get anything right—whatever stories I might tell—not only am I going to avoid looking, but I’m going to be triggered beyond belief when I finally do, when I’m finally presented with the information.”

  • Resistance shows us where we need to heal
  • Letting fear guide our healing work
  • Acupressure as a tool to disrupt stories and interpretations
  • There’s no fixed way things should or shouldn’t be
  • What are you making things mean?

“Things just are what they are. You just weigh what you weigh. You just have the debt that you have. You have the proficiency that you have. It literally doesn’t mean anything else about you, them, or the world. But that’s what we do when we interpret. We make it mean something that triggers our core wounds and our winning strategy. And then, we start to operate in such a way that we can produce comfortable, known outcomes. We can go back into avoidance.”

  • Insight and information help us move forward
  • Using these things as a point of reference for growth
  • Feel how you’re feeling, but don’t tell stories
  • The context of feedback matters
  • Letting ourselves be a “bad” beginner is crucial
  • Improvement doesn’t imply something negative about you

“If we’re afraid to look at things, it’s hard for us to progress. And when we’re doing the impossible, we have to be a beginner. We have to suck at things sometimes. We’re usually doing something we’ve never done before, otherwise we wouldn’t think it’s impossible. There’s room for improvement. There’s room for growth. There’s room for learning and more proficiency. Do we make that a story about ourselves?”